Seriously, why didn't I start this weight loss journey a long time ago? I weigh over 400 pounds and I can barely walk, why the heck didn't I do something about it before now?
I reached an absolute low point when I was taking a bath at my parents house. Bathing has become a major chore for me. It usually involves tons of physical effort, lots of discomfort along with some pain and a bucket or two of tears. Yes, I did say tears. I end up crying nearly every time I bathe. The effort to bathe or shower kicks my behind so hard that I don't bathe often enough. This is a deep dark secret that currently only my family knows but now, everyone will know. I don't bathe often enough because I'm scared.
Scared to bathe? Sounds weird I know but afterwards, I am so exhausted, I almost feel like I can't go on. So I get depressed and I cry, sometimes I start to hypervenilate and have a full-blown anxiety attack. It is AWFUL and I hate it! So I do a lot of the so-called "spit bath" with baby wipes and a cleansing spray they use in resthomes. It isn't the same though but I do the best I can with what I've got.
But the last time I took a bathe, I could not find the energy to even make the attempt to get up to get out of the bath tub so I sat there and cried. That was the defining moment for me and THAT'S when I joined Weight Watchers to do something about my weight.
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